Crossroads

I am excited to announce that an idea that I had been throwing around for a while has suddenly manifested itself and I was able to pop out a first draft of a novel. It will be a Christmas novella and will come out for December. It is call A Double Christmas. I also have some more Christmas novellas in the works that will be ready in time for the holiday.

I know that I haven't written a blog in a while but i am at a stand still in my life. I will admit it. I've only ever wanted to be a writer but it doesn't pay the bills. I have tried everything and, I know that this is blunt, but I'm feeling like maybe it is not a calling for a main business. I have been job hunting with no luck and I don't know what to do. Should I pursue another career for income even if it's something that I'm not passionate about?

I have tried getting work that doesn't involve certificates but I might have to try to take some courses in something that will get us through financially. I do have a part time job at a florist but it is very minimum wage and the rest, I'm afraid to say, is through disability. I have never spoken about this before but the dark places in my books come from a place of mental illness which I try to survive every day.

I don't think that i can ever give up on my writing and I am jealous of those who can financially get by while doing what they love. I have pushed, but to no avail. I am reminded of the movie Amadeus where an aspiring musician asks God, "Why would you give me such a love for something that I can never have?" Of course, for those who have not seen it the ending answers the question. He inspired Amadeus who would inspire many.

Maybe one day I will inspire someone who will inspire many, or I will be a great writer once I have passed. It is hard to say but I must believe that there is a purpose in all this and I must find my way through these difficult times. For those who have stood by me through my writing thank you and I appreciate it. I am working on more novellas, an Irish folklore one, two on witches and a couple adventure ones. I will let everyone know what my decision is when I make it, but please don't think that I am giving up. I am only at a temporary stand still and I will write until my dying days. take care everyone :)